A little bit about my life
I met Human Design in 1994 and had a reading with Ra Uru Hu in 1997. It is when he first brought Type & Strategy to the USA.  I went deeply into my experiment.  I have worked with hundreds (maybe thousands) of people since 1997 both live and online.  In all that I have offered, I stayed with the simple because it was the simple that transformed me and my life.

Below I've shared some writings from the past - about my experience and being with Ra.  

During my reading with Ra, he told me “Don’t believe me. You experiment and find out for yourself.”  He also said “don’t believe me” hundreds of times over all his years of teaching. This impacted me greatly. As someone who had been searching for over 20 years before meeting Ra and having my reading.  Having an open Ajna, it was so easy to “believe” the teachers who influenced me along the way, and to take in deeply what they taught or shared and try to have that be my truth.  

Now I met someone who told me not to believe him. This was a breath of fresh air. I have to admit I loved that he wore black, smoked and was so non-spiritual in the traditional sense I was used to. In my reading, he told me that I was not emotional. (I have an open solar plexus center.) I didn’t verbalize what I was thinking but it was “this Human Design is great but me not being emotional? This is so not me. I am the most emotional person I know.” So, I did not believe him. 

I left that reading understanding that I needed to wait to respond, that my sounds were my answer and that I needed yes/no questions. I also got that Ra could not believe anything I said about myself in words to be true. That the only truth he could trust were my sacral sounds.

And so I began my experiment. It was very difficult to go against all the years of living as a very out-going, social person who initiated everything with everyone. To not fall into those old patterns of behavior was the hardest thing I have done in this life. But “waiting” was truly the secret. When every one of my cells was jumping up and down inside of me wanting me to go in the old pattern, I would just wait. Slowly it got easier. And easier. 

I could feel a huge shift inside. An inner alignment was happening and I knew I had never experienced anything like this before. It turned my whole life upside down. All my relationships – husband, family, friends, colleagues – changed. I was no longer who they knew me to be and this was not easy for anyone. I was also no longer who I knew myself to be!

Over the years, my sacral responded “unun” to Ra and what he was telling me, many times. To be able to confront (but only in sounds – never words) an ego Manifestor with a powerful aura was a true test for me of Human Design and what it can bring. For someone who was so easily swayed by the outside, it was delightfully shocking to stand so strong and true within myself.

I remember when Ra introduced PHS. It was after I had completed my first seven years. He gave me a reading about my PHS. I shared it with my husband and family but whenever they asked if I wanted or needed to eat that way, I had a big “unun” (no). Once in a while, a day here and there, I would have an “ahunh”. But I knew not to do my PHS just because it was what was taught in Human Design. Nothing has authority over my inner authority. This is what he meant by “Don’t believe me”. 

No one can know what any one of us should do because they are not us. Each one of us is unique. There is no one like us. We each are here to go on our journey. I love the analogy of the passenger and the vehicle. (The Design/unconscious and Personality/conscious). We sit in the back seat of our vehicle and sometimes another vehicle moves up next to ours. Sometimes that vehicle travels the whole life side by side with our vehicle. Sometimes it just for a little while. But it is always two separate passengers sitting in the back seat of their unique vehicle.

Through responding, I ended up on Ibiza for “no reason” at all except my sounds were strong to a question from a Projector friend if I was coming. I had no idea why. I was at Ra’s home and we were just hanging out and I heard myself blurt out “it’s driving my mind crazy that my sacral keeps going “unun” to my PHS. It can’t understand why if PHS is supposed to be so healthy for us”.

He looked at me and said “I put too much emphasis on diet. You digest life in silence and in your own aura”. To which my sacral responded so strongly “ahunh” many times in a row (YES!) Now THIS was my truth, and I could feel it in every one of my cells. I see the truth of this, every evening when I finally get into bed at night. The lights are out, there is no one in my aura and it’s silent. It’s not that I think about my life – it’s more like things just surface and there is a deep seeing and understanding.

During that meeting, he was very excited about the holistic analysis he was doing. He asked me “what are your nodes?” All I could do was shrug my shoulders and say “I don’t know”. He looked at me shocked. And then he started laughing and I started laughing. It was such a deep connection – this laughter. If he had asked me that question 10 years ago or 15 years or 20 years, I would have been able to answer. But now? I don’t remember all the aspects of my chart. I just live me. I don’t live my life through the lens of Human Design. Yes, sometimes something does come up about Human Design – but it is not a filter that I live from. I am aligned in myself and I know my frequency (my song). It is clear and real and true. It is this I live.

The beauty of this crazy trip that I took to Ibiza for “no reason” was beyond just finding out about my PHS being about how I digest life. It was also the last time I was with Ra before his body died. I needed to be there to have this one last meeting with him and life unfolded in a way that let that happen in spite of it seeming so crazy. It made no sense to go to Ibiza and not just that but it cost quite a bit of money for airfare and hotel. But the one thing I had discovered from my own experiment is that none of that mattered. The only thing that mattered was that I honored my inner authority. It is my sacred GPS. It is this that navigates me in my journey. I know where I have been. I know where I am now. But I have no idea at all about where I am going. It is my inner authority that takes me there.

In this I have moved out of the world as it is. I have my own unique life to live unlike anyone else. I don’t look to see what others are doing nor do I compare myself to others. I belong to no group. I belong to no one other than myself. I have no loyalty except to stay true to myself. 

For me, the gift of Human Design is not the knowledge of the Human Design System. For me, its greatest gift is that it is a tool for true transformation. And it is not a tool that is a new belief system for the mind to start living life from. It gives a way to truly transform and it is felt in the body itself – in the form itself. And this takes time because it is not a mental change but a cellular transformation. 

It is found in the deep satisfaction a Generator/MG feels after experimenting with waiting to respond. It is found in the sweet taste of success that a Projector feels when they wait for the invitation. It is found in the peace that the Manifestor gets to experience when they inform. And it is found in the wonder that fills the life of the Reflector when they experience the beauty of transitoriness.

Yes, there is Strategy and Inner Authority or the decision making process that are the simple tools from the Human Design System. But it is not that these things are to be believed. They are simply the framework for the experiment. An experiment needs to have a premise. Something to begin with to prove if it is true or not. This is the premise of the Human Design experiment. Strategy and authority. And only each person can find out for themselves if it works or not. That’s what Ra told me in my reading “Don’t believe me. You experiment and find out for yourself”. And I did. And for me it gave me everything I had searched for in this life. It gave me what I had been longing for. It gave me myself."

Below is something I wrote shortly after Ra died.  His death was a shock to me. I lived my whole life before my experiment as an emotional being.  I am not.  As you can see in my chart above, my spleen is very defined.  I am not "hot" - I am "cool".  There were no tears when I heard he died. I went ice cold.  I could not get warm.  I was wrapped in duvets and warm clothes.  My husband kept asking me if I was ok and I responded "ahunh" (yes).  He kept asking me if I needed to go to Ibiza and my response was always "unun" (no).

I felt like I was being contained in a cold energy field and there was nothing I could do about it.  It was days later that I felt freed from this state.  Only in retrospect did I understand that it was 72 hours later.  He had completed his Bardo.  I was no longer cold and my husband asked again if I needed to go to Ibiza.  I responded strongly "ahunh". 

I found a surprisingly inexpensive ticket for that afternoon.  I packed and flew out that very day.

Since Ra died, I find myself sometimes flooded by feelings and memories. I met the Human Design System years before I met Ra.  But I always was very curious about the man who this system came through and I finally got to meet him when he came to Sedona and gave an evening introductory lecture. I loved his irreverence – it was like a breath of fresh air for me. He cursed, he smoked and he dressed in black and made no apologies for being himself. He came to Sedona bringing the mechanics of Type and Strategy. Up until that moment, there was no such thing as Type or Strategy. 
I never wanted to learn Human Design. I only wanted to live it and see if it gave me what I longed for. I had been searching 20+ years when I met Human Design having sat with many spiritual teachers in white hats who pointed to something but gave me no map.  What Ra gave me in my reading seemed like the map. But I had to live it to discover if it really was.
He was a tricky guy. He’d always ask me when he was leaving if he would see me in the next place he’d be. He called the “2” of my 6/2 profile and my sacral always responded. And so for years and years, I sat in every class he taught absorbing what he was saying into my body. Because I never wanted to learn it, I would just close my eyes and listen and let it all penetrate my cells. I never took notes. I respected Ra tremendously as a teacher but I never thought of him as my teacher – I always thought of him as my friend. 
That very first time in Sedona, at the end of his visit, he asked me if I wanted to have a gathering at my house so he could play his guitar and sing his songs. He told me it was his way of sharing his feelings with people – something couldnot happen in the classroom. I responded and about 30 people gathered at my home and Ra played his music. It was then that the respect of the teacher changed to love of this human being. He was more than my friend.  I loved Ra’s music – it was jazzy and freaky and in the early days I would sing along but not know what I was singing about. Years later, as I fell deeper into the truth of me, I knew and it was a great joy to sing those words. It was only two weeks ago, he sent me a clip of a video that Loki, his son, had created. It was a tribute to Albert Einstein. It was an amazing video of the man Ra.  Over the years, he would once in awhile send me the mp3 of a new song he had created. 
Late at night, the memories come one after another with a sad-sweetness. I remember sitting on the couch with him at Beverly’s home in Las Vegas watching Bill Cosby in an old taped stand up comedy routine. We were laughing so hard we were both crying. I remember another time sitting watching MTV and some old rock and roll bands were on – relaxed and enjoying the music from a generation we both shared.  I remember visiting his home in Sedona after he had come across an audio cassette of music he had created with his band from the time right before the voice – both of us sitting on the couch with our eyes closed listening to it.  
I first met Ra and then a few years later, I met his whole family. I often felt like a sister to his wife and an aunt to his sons and sometimes like an adopted mother to his daughter. My heart goes out to each of them during this painful time.  
I am so grateful that I went on that very bizarre looking trip to Ibiza the month before Ra died. It came out of the blue and I had no idea why I was going. It looked ridiculous on the outside to fly across the ocean traveling for almost 23 hours door to door and to only spend 5 days for no other reason than my sacral responded.  The weird part was that it had an “unun” (no) when my husband asked me if I wanted to go and it had an “ahunh” (yes) when he asked me if I needed to go. Need always supersedes want.
This trip gave me some very precious time with Ra. There was no Human Design event and we were just able to visit and hang out. I said “you know it seems so crazy that my sacral goes no to doing my PHS because PHS is about the form.”  He told me that it was more than the diet and that for me it was about silence. How important silence was in my life. How I needed silence.  My whole body resonated to this – I could feel the truth of it. He then asked me what were my nodes. I cracked up laughing and said “you know I don’t remember all those things on my chart. I just live my life as a Generator”.  He started laughing too and then looked at me and said “It is really good to see you again”. 
I spent many times with Ra laughing so hard that we both would start crying.  In looking back, I see how perfect it was that this was our last physical meeting.   This poem wrote itself in those early days.  It was after my first reading with Ra about 30 years ago.

I didn't know!I didn't know!
Until a stranger came to townDressed in blackAnd said to me:'Who you are livingIs not really you'
Words falling insideLike a heavy rain hitting parched earth
Words so trueThey shook my bones
Words that went even deepertill they rattled my soul
Torturous daysEndless nightsTotal devastationNothing else would doNothing else would do
To lose all I knewFilled me with the bile of fearBut to not riskFilled me with the fear of eternity
Feet in a swimming poolEyes finding answers in the blue skyAnd I knew . . .I knewI had no choice.